Guy on a Bench – Part 1

He’s in his mid-30’s and pleasant looking. He sits on the bus stop bench at the corner of Redwood and McPherson. Whenever Wilson (my 13-year old dog) and I walk by, our interaction usually goes like this:

“How’re you doing?”

“Fine. How’re you?”


“Have a good one.”

“You, too. Bye.”


This time, my “How’re you doing?” is responded with “Not so good.”

I stop. “What’s wrong?”

“It’s the same old thing day after day.”

I imagine it is. He sits on this bench nearly all day every day.

“People either accost me for money or ask if I want to buy drugs. I tell them no, but they keep harassing me. I don’t know what to do about it. There’s no solution.”

I can think of one: Stop sitting on this bench nearly all day every day.

“I guess I’ll have to eventually get the cops involved.”

“That might help.”

“Yeah. Thanks.”

“You’re welcome. Have a good one.”

“You, too.”

My advice to stop sitting on that bench becomes a metaphor for handling my own troubles.

I don’t know what to do about the five extra pounds I can’t seem to shake.

But my body aches after I work out.

  • Stop sitting on that bench: stretch for 10-15 minutes after each workout.

I don’t have time to do that, so let’s change the subject.

When Gary goes on a whistling marathon, I want to yell at him.

But then I won’t lose these five pounds.

  • Stop sitting on that bench: work out more.

But then my body will ache all the time.

  • Stop sitting on that bench: then stretch more.

This all seems like too much trouble.

  • Keep sitting on your stupid bench and shut the hell up!

You shut up!

No, you shut up!

And so it goes.

My friend and I continue to sit on our respective benches.

8 thoughts on “Guy on a Bench – Part 1

  1. I love the conversations we have with ourselves! So funny. You tell that inner voice to shut up when it yells at you to stop eating chocolate cream pie.

  2. I just did! In fact, it’s such a beautiful day that I’m heading out right now to walk to The Purity to buy one! (And some eggs. The eggs are just an excuse to get back to the pie section!)

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