The July 18 Fort Bragg Advocate News article begins simple enough: “If approved by the City Planning Commission, Fort Bragg residents may see a new shopping outlet open soon.” It goes on to say blah, blah, blah “Dollar Tree store.”

If you’ve lived on the Mendocino Coast longer than six months, you know these are fightin’ words.The Advocate Facebook page lit up with 44 comments that can be classified into the following thought-provoking arguments:

The Logical: Fort Bragg Desperately needs a dollar store for all the low income they have there. The people deserve a break. Give them a Dollar Store so they don’t have to drive to Willits anymore and they will be able to have money to spend at other stores.

The Big Ass Watermelon: now i dont have to drive to Ukiah to buy everything!! Everyone always says shop locally but when you shop locally its like getting bent over and a big ass watermelon shoved up your ass.

The Grandma Cleaning Solution Recipe: I worry that it will just drive the urge to consume needless products. But, I can’t buy into the “cheap” cleaning supplies argument. Why even waste money on cleaning supplies that are full of toxic chemicals. Grandma taught me well- Vinegar Tips – Cleaning with Vinegar http://www.vinegartips.com

The I’ll Criticize Your Spelling & Give You a Quick English Lesson:

First comment: Fort Bragg needs this like it needs a whole in the head!

Rebuttal comment: I assume you mean “hole” as I’m not sure what “whole” in the head would equate to. I’m would suggest you educate yourself on what Fort Bragg needs (such as JOBS of any kind,affordable shopping for people who live at or below the poverty line,etc,etc) but it looks like you need help in basic English Composition. I wish you luck.

The (Yes!) Plug The Purity: Between Down Home Foods and Purity I can get pretty much all I need.

The Love It Or Leave It: Why not move where these stores are if you like it so much?

The I Have Limited Time to Protest: boooo

The Sarcastic: Now, if Fort Bragg can just a get a Wal-Mart to come in, then everything will be just dandy!

The Need To Clarify Whether Or Not The Previous is Sarcasm: tongue-in-cheek-RIGHT?

The Off Topic: you know that whole thing about “having to buy bags”? i just bought two bags of produce at harvest market and when we used two of our own cloth bags; the checker took $.20 off our bill!!!! where’s big corporate safeway on that issue? just a thought…

The Hiding From Pseudo Hippy Friends: Lol, all the people bitching about the dollar store actually do shop at the one over the hill but don’t want their psuedo hippy friends to know, and so if there’s one here they will be “caught”. Since I’ve seen a lot of fort bragg and mendo people shopping in ukiah I find it hard 2 believe that all these people are so against it. Maybe its because while its fun to protest everything, these people are secret wal mart fans

The Please Stop Talking About Wal-Mart: Okay. WalMart is a moot point. Drop it now. If you’ll recall, WalMart does not wish to locate here. The demographics do not fit their model for placing a store on the coast. You can want WalMart a lot but it will never happen. It’s not up to you.

The Good Old-Fashioned Bread: What ever happened to good old-fashioned bread and circuses? Can someone tell me why a Dollar Store is a higher priority than Chuck E. Cheese?

The Listen To Me: PEOPLE !!! you NEED to be in attendance for any hearings on this if you want to show your want for this…

The I Didn’t Read the Article: and where are they wanting to put it

Whenever the local populous becomes so passionate about an issue, I find it hard to pick a favorite, but here it is—

The Ship Out The Crack Heads and Liquid Plumber Affordability: The crack heads don’t enhance the area. If you want to enhance the area, get rid of them! We NEED convenient and CHEAP shopping. Some of us can’t afford your “high quality” liquid plumber. (Same ingredients)